Tuesday, January 29, 2008


Okay, getting back and reading various posts about this whole transgender vs. HBS thing... I have a whole post about it that I'll write later (too hungry now--and I need to see some friends that have been out of town for months), but for now:

I do not support calling any trans*person a "man in a dress", questioning their gender, insults, etc.
I will warn and ban anyone that seriously calls someone by the wrong pronouns (even if they do something "cute" like sHe or fe[Male]).
I don't support making fun of someone's looks or ability to pass.
I don't support what Marti said regarding her "get technical" comment. If she meant something else I wish she would have clarified or qualified her statement (such as, society sees you, according to some medical definitions, etc).
I don't think that surgery makes or affirms anyone's gender unless they themselves see that that surgery affirms their own gender. So while perhaps your surgery affirms your manhood, do not say or imply that anyone who didn't get or doesn't want that surgery isn't affirming their gender (or isn't actually their gender).

I don't care if you're genderqueer or afflicted with HBS or however you define yourself. You will respect other people and will not make generalizations about groups.
If you think I've done any of the above point it out to me and I'll either explain myself further, apologize, or whatever depending on the situation. (I have a post regarding my HBS post in the works, fyi).

Here's how I identify and some of my views on gender/sex in case anyone is confused or curious:
My sex is transsexual male; I happen to think that my transsexuality is biologically based. My gender is man; I am not a transman, trannyboi,, etc.
My gender happens to fall withing the gender binary; this does not mean that I think everyone's does/should. I think the binary hurts many of us and that things would be better if there were more options and less strictly-defined roles. But I do not think that identifying within the binary is bad or harmful or somehow 'worse' than identifying outside the binary.
I use trans* as an umbrella term for transsexual, third gender, genderqueer, etc. folks. The only time I mean crossdressers is if they are also trans* or if crossdressing is their way of showing that they don't always identify as their assigned sex/gender (I'm not sure how to explain what I mean--I've seen bigender used to differentiate between crossdressers and people who crossdress to express another part of them, but I'm not sure if that's the accepted definition or how common/preferred bigender is).
ETA: Okay, I keep waffling on where I see crossdressers, so ignore what I say about whether or not I include crossdressers under the trans* umbrella--I just keep changing my mind. (Damn you Trinity for making me think! ^.~)

I don't think that all trans*folks are the same or have the same needs. But I also think that we need to band together despite our differences and despite a society that would make all of us disappear if it could (and it has tried to).

My sexual/romantic orientation is queer or gay. Gay for simplicities sake, queer if I want to be exact. Queer because I sometimes, though rarely, like women; queer because I may fall for someone who doesn't fall within the binary. Not queer because I happen to be transsexual; while I realize that much of society sees all trans* folks as queer, I don't think that being trans* (of any sort--transsexual or third gender) makes you queer unless that is a part of your personal definition/identify.
I am also somewhat feminine. Probably somewhere on the feminine/flaming side of androgynous/geeky to be exact. If I wasn't lazy and I could wear what I wanted and always pass I would wear glitter and eyeliner, but I'd continue to wear my dragon-print button downs (though I really want to do that anime thing where I wear a button down without another shirt on under it...). Yet I am still just as male, just as much of a man as my cissexual male friends that do the same. Hellfires, I have a few gay cismale friends who are even more flaming than I and they are still unquestionably male and men.

Type rest of the post here