Julie Bindel and My Childhood

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There is a continuum ya know

So, I'm thinking of a few posts I have in the works (and as I write this intro I'm still not sure which this post will turn out to be); one on my childhood[trannyhood], women-only space and "WBW"-only space, or one about me my genitals and sex. Being in my childhood home, filled with memories, I don't feel like crying (no I wasn't abused or anything. It's just that I really, really miss my cat, my best friend for over a decade, and this house is filled with memories of her).
Or, as seems to be popular, write about my thoughts on WBW and women-only space. Not only do I find that topic to be becoming somewhat boring, but I also feel...odd commenting on the validity of women-only space as I am a man. Perhaps, when I've thought more about it, I will write on being a man in women-only space (while my school itself was co-ed, the dorms and certain classes were single-sex) and how gorram uncomfortable it was.

So, since I miss my boyfriend (and sex), I'll write about sex.


Ok, fooled ya, I'll write about my relationship with my body as well as give an unsexy and probably somewhat clinical overview of how the romantic and sexual relationship with my BF have progressed. I've been reading the comments on certain posts over at Bilerico and I am somewhat amused by how guys like me went from a HBS/transsexual man to "woman with a fetish" due to a single act.

Plus, it gives me a chance to brag about how much I like most of my body; despite having confidence problems in some areas, I am still quite vain (I am a Slytherin after all). ^.^

Moreover, I recently found the text of Eli Clare's speech given at the Philly Trans* health conference and it is so amazing.
Looking at shame and body shame; specifically within trans* and disability contexts:
“This obsession with cure turns disabled bodies into medical problems to be solved. In doing so, it ignores disability as an issue of social justice. Ignores that many disabled people would rather put an end to ableism than have our bodies “fixed.” Of course this gets complicated when I turn back to trans community, to those of us who seek to reshape our gendered and sexed bodies. But really it’s not our desire or need for bodily change that I’m challenging here. Rather, it’s how we name those desires and needs, because to claim our bodies as defective and to pair defect with cure, not only disregards the experiences of many disabled people, it also leaves us as trans people wide open to shame...Of course there’s another important strand of naming at work in our communities—a strand that declares transness not a disease, gender nonconformity not a pathology, and bodily uniqueness not an illness, a strand that turns the word dysphoria inside out, claiming that we are not the ones dysphoric about our genders, but rather dysphoria lives in the world’s response to us. This naming acts as a necessary counterbalance. But I have to ask: what about those of us who do in truth deal with deep, persistent body disonnance, discomfort, dysphoria? A social justice politics by itself will never be enough to resist shame. ”
I see my transsexuality as a medical condition (not defect) and medical transition as a way of treating my body dissonance. But I still agree with Eli, being trans* (or disabled) does not make us defective, it is society and how society sees and treats us that is defective. Yes, both groups may need treatment, but we don't need to be disappeared or 'cured' into normalcy. As I re-state later, we also have the right to refuse treatment or to choose an alternate treatment to the mainstream options.

Okay, back to me and my body; I just wanted to give a shout out to that fantastic speech.

My relationship with my body is rather complicated to say the least.

I am quite happy with most of my body. While my hair does not always cooperate, I find it to be pleasing to the sight and touch--especially when I can dye it green. My face is attractive enough I suppose, I wish my lips weren't quite so pink though--makes me look like I'm wearing pink lipstick and I look too much like a girl if I cover them with black or deep brown instead...
I am quite fond of my legs, nicely shaped imo and with a decent amount of hair. While I wish I was taller, it's not a major issue .
My arms, despite being thin, are actually quite "masculine" being as they are quite hairy and have visible veins. They are actually one of my favorite body parts, not just because of how they help me pass as a cis*guy, but their overall look, shape and texture and whatnot, is quite pleasing to my eyes--I love the almost blue cast my veins give my arms.

I have some problems with my torso and hip areas though.
I always have bruises on my hips; while they are still relatively narrow, I still forget how wide they are and I bump into walls and tables.
I have a great deal of dissonance regarding my chest; I'll go to take off my shirt and, sometimes, I will be honestly surprised that I have gynecomastia (breast growth on men).
Luckily for me, it isn't a very bad case, a sports bra and a bit of layering is enough to hide it most of the time. But...my group of friends enjoys having "shirtless o' clock" and I enjoy being nude when it's just my BF and I. Moreover, it is incredibly uncomfortable wearing four layers in 80 degree weather. I want it gone, not just hidden.
There are times, like now actually, when I only take a shower every other day just so that I don't have to confront the dissonance.
I pray to the Gods that when I eventually start hormones there will be enough fat redistribution to take care of it. I don't want to put myself at the mercy of hospitals and doctors and hospital staff and insurance companies more than I have to. I've heard too many stories, even just from friends and family, about uncaring nurses, insurance bureaucracy, transphobic staff, and the like. Not to forget that I hate the idea of being helpless and unconscious as some strangers cut me open; if I can I will most definitely have a friend watch over the surgery to make sure nothing happens. And a night at a hospital scares me; what if I get a nurse like the one my mom had after her heart surgery--one who refused to come to help and who left my mom's ESL roommate in pain because she couldn't be bothered to show her where or how the "morphine button" worked. And this is 'just' about top-surgery, How will I feel about genital surgery? Though, for anyone not aware, top-surgery is often deemed more important than any genital surgery by many transgender and transsexual guys (according to what I've seen over the years in various ftm communities).

Ahh... now for the uncomfortable part: my genitals.
Truth be told, I used to hate them.
Growing up and even into adolescence, I would 'hold it' for as long as I could before going to the bathroom--I couldn't stand to sit. Later, when I first attempted to masturbate I disassociated myself entirely and found no enjoyment.
And even later, when my BF and I were first starting to go beyond kissing, I told him to ignore and pretend like I didn't have a vagina at all; and that I wasn't sure about the rest of the area, but he wouldn't be the only one getting any fun.
Eventually, we started to do more than kiss. Eventually, we found things that didn't set off my dissonance too badly that were still fun for the both of us. And, eventually, I came to trust that he sees me as a guy no matter what. No matter that my chest wasn't flat when unclothed, no matter that I didn't have a typical cock, no matter that I have an extra hole.

So, after much thinking and me having to convince him that I actually wanted to, we tried PIV.
And I found that it wasn't so bad--that as long as he still saw me as a man I was usually able to ignore the dissonance.
And surprisingly, I found that when I was feeling bad about being trans*, when I wasn't passing, when I felt like it would be better to just hit the reset button on this life...that having my most important person be made acutely aware of how my body is not male-assigned and yet still having him see me as 100% man was enough to get me through (the orgasms afterwards helped too of course).
It's not a fetish. I still can't masturbate and I'm sure that it'll take a lot of time to develop this level of trust in my future relationships.
It's validation from my most important person; the feeling of love and trust mixed with the knowledge that no matter what I am a man...it isn't sexual for me--it's something else entirely--English doesn't have the words to describe how it feels for me.

As for the penis (and lack of a vag') making the man... Well, in my case I'd really like a peen, my map says I should have one and there is no way I can describe how much it hurts to have my body not match my map that badly. Hopefully hormones, when I eventually go on them (no insurance and it's bloody hard to find anywhere that'll sell T without a script), will make my dick grow enough to lessen the discord to a manageable level... But I'm pretty sure I'll keep the vag'; I've grown to like it, the dissonance surrounding it is manageable, and PIV is way easier than anal (and I am so very lazy).
So anyone, be they HBS or Christian or feminist or have letters after their name, wants to tell me that learning to cope with a vag' makes me less of a man...well they can go fuck themselves with rusty railroad spikes.

Not respecting trans* identities because that person is not as disphoric as you think they need to be is cissexism; it's just as cissexist as not respecting trans* identities period.

My body is my own; I will change what I believe will lessen the most dissonance, keep what I can learn to live with or even cherish, and leave the parts that were never a problem alone.
And I do want genital surgery, but this doesn't make me more of a man than a guy who has been able to deal with, or never had, the same level of dissonance about his genitals (same idea for women btw).
I don't think every trans*person can, or should, attempt to live their life without surgery/hormones. Some people just don't have the same levels of dissonance, some people are able to work through it without hormones and/or surgery. But I also don't think that medical transition, or surgery, should be requirements for being a transsexual or for legal transition.

I won't live my life without medical transition; if I am prevented for too long I know that I'll eventually kill myself. The dissonance is that great; and learning to live with my body-as-is is merely a stopgap measure to help me deal until I can medically transition. But this also means that I can see how a trans*person with less dissonance can work through their dissonance enough to live without medical transition. Remember, some people can pass without any medical transition. And some people don't care as much about passing as a cis*person as long as their loved ones see them as who they are.
I can also see that some people need medical transition ASAP and that hormones and surgery mean a lot to them. Sometimes, it must seem like some transgender folks are saying that anyone can or should live without medical transition (and there are some folks that do believe that); that medical transition isn't important.
And some of these folks think that all trans*/transgender folks think that no one should have them.
And while I can see it from their point of view...they need to stop and learn that even if someone doesn't need surgery that doesn't mean that they necessarily believe that no one needs surgery.
Furthermore, just as important, that one's medical decisions do not change their identity and nor do they define their identity. People have the right to seek alternate treatments and moreover I do not know of any medical condition that is diagnosed by the treatments one chooses to use.

I don't know where my transition will take me. I won't let others tell me what i have to do to be respected or a valid man. I won't let anyone tell other folks what they must do to be respected or a valid person either. Everyone is different and should be respected.
Nature abhors rigid categories; humans are the ones that create and define rigid categories, not Her.

“Although I doubt there is one complete passage between shame and pride, there are many tunnels through the thicket, and on the other side lives an openness that lets us slide into our bodies and makes space for persistent joy and comfort. Body love can wake us up in the morning, put us to bed at night, visit us as we’re dressing to go out or just singing along to our favorite song. These moments don’t usually arrive as big, as loud, as brash, as a Pride parade. They just show up one day in the mirror or the camera, not that we’ve passively waited for them. No, we’re all too aware of how hard we’ve worked for them, but still they arrive unexpected. Sometimes in community or with a single friend. Sometimes with the encouragement of families and partners, or in collaboration with health care providers and therapists. Sometimes they arrive as we’re rabblerousing in the streets or when we’re stuffing envelopes for the next fundraiser. They arrive as we tromp through the woods or walk down the street or dance up a storm on Friday night.
However those moments arrive, let’s build community that nurtures them. Let’s figure out ways of naming bodily difference that fosters comfort and joy. Let’s build a politics that holds space, safety, options, and shuts no one out. Let’s pay attention to shame as both a community issue and a health issue. Let’s create the space to make our bodies home, filling our skin to its very edges.”--Eli Clare

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Beattie

So, as this is my blog, here are my thoughts on this matter:

I've been hearing of pregnant trans*men since I first started researching trans*ism, transition, and ftm-spectrum trans*folks.
So this isn't a big deal to me; I got over my shock that *gasp* not everyone is me and therefore not everyone has the same level of dissonance around the same exact things as I do.
I could never get pregnant and carry to term.
Not only do I have no desire for children, but I could never carry a pregnancy to term and stay sane/alive.
The few times my period was late after boyfriend J and I started having PIV sex I freaked out and looked up my bookmarked "how to terminate at home" links. I planned to wait one more week before buying orange juice, vitamin C tablets, etc. for a vitamin C abortion.
Luckily, my period started a couple days later no one else the wiser (J is the type who won't do things that make me feel uncomfortable even when I say it's okay).

So yeah, while I could never carry a kid and I have no desire to...I have no problem recognizing that many men want to and they are still men. As well as there are many ftm-spectrum folks who do not identify as man/male would want to have a biological child and this alone does not make them women (they're only women if that's already a part of their identity).
Hellfires, I'm sure there are cis*men who would want to carry their own kid and will if technology ever progresses so far (or virtually if virtual tech ever gets there).

"I see no justifiable reason why a man shouldn’t be able to become pregnant if he has the physical capacity to do so - without threatening his legal status as a man." Says Rebecca.



And on a different note, a woman's suit against her would-be employer will go forward. Izabella Lopez was offered a job at River Oaks Imaging and Diagnostic and when they did a background check and realized she's a trans*woman they took back the offer; citing a "policy of refusing to hire people whose background checks reveal they misrepresented themselves to get hired." Of course, Ms. Lopez put both her current and former legal names on the application and the section for names to search in the background check. And at least one of the Oaks employees knew her as a trans*woman.

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A few things...

#One, I edited the definitions post a bit.

#Two, re trans* vs. HBS: If you don't identify as trans* (transgender, transsexual, transman, etc.) than don't apply it to yourself. If you identify as a woman with HBS and not as a trans* woman than don't apply anything I say about trans*women or trans*folk to yourself. If whatever I'm saying is similar to what you've experienced or is true for you, but you don't identify as a trans*person then too bad--you don't get it both ways. If you don't want to identify, even just politically, with trans*folk then don't fucking apply yourself to my words. If you don't identify as trans*, but realize it is also a political group and an umbrella term and you believe you fall under one or both of those then you can, if you choose, apply what I say about trans*folk to yourself.
Basically, if you don't believe trans* applies to you than it doesn't and I don't want to deal with elitist HBS women (or, for that matter) and other elitists. (Fyi, I dislike both elitist HBS folks and elitist genderqueer/nonbinary folks--I've just met more of the former than the latter)
#Two-point-five, I agree with Raven Kaldera on whether or not transsexuality should be seen as or labeled as an intersex condition; ie: it shouldn't be. We should be allies an work together, but we are most definitely different groups (with some over-lap)--just like queer and trans*folk.

#Three, I haven't posted much lately because I have a new job (as well as a high libido and a willing boyfriend ^.~ no, I won't share details though). I also have various other offline issues like depression and spiritual and friend drama going on and I can't just ignore it (tried that, doesn't ever work).

#Four, because I want to voice my support though I don't have the time/energy for a blogwar, Blackamazon is totally more awesome and better-informed on PP history than The Apostate.

#Five, please support the Southall Black Sisters.

#Six, I wish I could've posted something for Sex Workers' Rights Day, but I don't think I even got online that day.

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Too fucking easy.

Tradgedies galore.
Here's an article by a LJ friend of mine on how fucking easy it is to kill trans*folk. There's also an article about a ten-year old's suicide because this male-assigned kid wanted to be a girl.


How To Kill a Transperson

By Ceridwen Troy
This article was written on Friday, Feb. 15, 2008.

On Saturday, Sanesha Stewart, a transwoman of color living in the Bronx, was murdered in her own apartment. She was 25 years old. Her accused killer, Steve McMillan, had known her for months, yet when he was arrested, he claimed to have been enraged to find out that she was what the media coverage called not really a woman. He stabbed her over and over again in the chest and throat. She tried to fight him off; there were defensive wounds found on her hands.

On Tuesday, eighth-grader Lawrence King was in a classroom in Oxnard, Calif. He was openly gay, and often came to school in gender-bending clothing, makeup, jewelry and shoes. According to another student, it was freaking the guys out. One of them shot Lawrence in the head. He was declared brain-dead on Wednesday.

It is easy to look at cases like this and think, how tragic. How random. How senseless.

But then, you forget how easy it is to kill a transgender person.

You forget that all across this nation, faith leaders of all stripes, men and women who claim to speak for God Himself, call us sinners, call us abominations, call us evil.

You forget that at best the media depicts us as something to be pitied, something that our families must be strong and overcome. At worst, they depict us as abnormal, exploiting our bodies for ratings, exploiting the publics fear of us for shock value.

You forget that on a good day, law enforcement agents are neglectful of us, and that far more frequently they join in our harassment. You forget the transwomen of color who are rounded up on suspicions of prostitution. You forget the beatings that go uninvestigated. You forget the molestation and rape we face when we are arrested.

You forget the medical establishment that drains our wallets for the therapy and hormones and surgeries they tell us we need. You forget the way we are then refused treatment when we are dying, dying of treatable diseases, dying of easily patched wounds.

You forget that, by the law of the land, it is legal in the majority of states to deny us employment, to deny us service, to deny us housing.

You forget the shelters and the rape crisis centers that will not allow us through their doors.

You forget that many of us do not even have family to turn to when we are at our most desperate.

You forget that the leaders of our own community have told us that it is not time for us to have rights, that it is not pragmatic for us to be considered worthy of the same respect as other human beings.

You forget that in our own circles, it is considered a negative thing to be too flamboyant. You forget the way our pride parades have been derided by our own community. You forget the scorn heaped upon drag queens by other gay men. You forget the fear to be seen in public with a friend who is considered too open, too queer.

You forget the way it seeps into the minds of transgender people, too. You forget the way a transsexual will shout that she is not a crossdresser, as if there were something wrong with that. You forget the catty names we call each other if we don’t pass”

You forget how many of us take our own lives every year.

You forget because the noise is always there, a constant drone in the background. Every newspaper piece that calls a transwoman he instead of she. Every talk show host who spends an hour talking about our genitals. Every childish taunt about looking like a tranny. Every transperson who talks about themselves as true transsexuals. Every activist and politician who tells us now is not the time.

You forget too, how easy it is to kill a person of color, with myths about gangstas and lies about immigrants. You forget how easy it is to kill a person living in poverty, cutting off her welfare because she is suuposedly being paid to breed. You forget how easy it is to kill a sex worker, with sex-shaming language, slinging about slurs like hooker and whore.

You forget the message hidden inside every single one of those statements.

You are less than I am. You are not worthy of the rights and respect that I am worthy of.

You are not human.

It is very easy to kill something that you do not see as human.

It is very easy to kill a transperson.


Gender torment of 10-year-old Cameron

(I'll use nongender pronouns for Cameron)
This poor kid, hir poor family... no one should have to bury their child.
And hir mom sounds far more supportive than many parents; she bought hir girls knickers and was their for hir and had only refused to buy hir make-up because sie was only ten.
I hate this society. I hate that a kid can feel so alone, so hopeless, that sie would kill themselves because they are or may be trans*.

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HBS bigots

I hate the smug, self-satisfying, classist, racist, sexist, heterosexist "Harry Benjamin Syndrome" transgender folk. (ETA: I'm sure there must be some HBS folk who aren't cissexist, sexist, etc, but every person I have ever come into contact with who identified as HBS, including the person I'm ranting about here, has said a great many bigoted things towards transgender, genderqueer, queer, etc. folk)
HBS is their term for trans*ism and they constantly use it to demean trans*folk who don't fit into their standards. Their standards? Straight, white, rich, gender-role conforming, post-surgery, deep stealth trans*women.

Every single time I have ever seen HBS used as an identity, that person has been incredibly homophobic and hateful towards other trans*people. people who otherwise might choose to identify as HBS, such as myself, choose not to be associated with such bigotry and stupidity.

I was just going to quote parts of this comment, but there was so much wrong that I can't choose (the non-italized is her quoting me).



"Mainstream society already saw us as freaks and fags and dykes way before he first trans* activists joined with the first queer activists–we were all perverts together you know.

Well, if your queer to begin with then your not likely to have been considered anything else. As a heterosexual I never felt that from mainstream. In fact, I was helped along by mainstream in all phases of my transition including employment. That would not happen today though since in recent years we are all considered queer. That is a direct result of the inclusion of us all in the transgender umbrella under the flag of the GLBT.

“Though I do hope that they focus on the laws that will help the poorest of us first–employment and housing would be nice”

Now why on earth should you want the United States or any other country for that matter to treat you any different than anyone else? Gays are employed and live everywhere across this nation. In fact some of the richest men and women on the planet are gay and lesbian. Seems like they didn’t need a special law to help them be who they are. Why do the transgendered need this when there are plenty of non-trans folk that cant get the same thing. You don’t see them out lobbying congress for the right to work and the right to have a home. Why are the gender queers so special? If you cant make it in society because you made the decision to transition knowing full well the consequences you faced, why should the rest of society make a special allotment for you to make up for your short fallings?

Transsexuals have been transitioning and having surgery for the past 60 years. The vast majority of them have transitioned and moved quietly into society without any help from anyone. They took the risks and lived with the consequences and when the going got tough they overcame. If someone decides to try to transition with no money or a low paying job or simply because they will have to commit suicide if they don’t transition, then they have to face the consequence of that. If they are so “female inside” yet they have little chance of even remotely assimilating as a woman yet they still decide to transition, why should employers be forced to hire them? If a person goes for a job anywhere they normally try to look their best for an interview. They don’t simply assume that an employer is going to overlook their appearance. Why should it be any different for transgenders that look hideous in their chosen gender mode? Hell, even gay owned businesses will not hire obvious trannys. Employment discrimination is not exclusive to mainstream.

The problem here is that the transgenders seem to feel that they are the victims. Instead of getting their act together they hang out on the internet and feel empowered by their “union”. Instead of looking at the way the real world works they yell and scream that they are being singled out. Its a victim mentality instead of a help yourself mentality. Those of us that have been successful at transition have either gotten their act together before jumping into the fire or had enough resources, smarts and inner fortitude to see it through transition. We knew it was financial suicide to embark on a journey with no way of reaching the goal.

Please, don’t tell me about those that “Have to transition or commit suicide” Its pure drama. If someone is suicidal about transition they have more problems than gender dysphoria. They need to sort those problems out first. Transition is not going to help them.

Transition is tough. It SHOULD be tough. It is the fire that will burn the fakers and temper the needy. It should make you stronger and make you whole and make you self reliant. If it doesn’t then you did something wrong.
"

Bigots like her make me want to hit someone. They are so blind to their own privilege and instead of focusing on those that actually hurt them, they choose to attack those in similar positions--people who should be their allies!

x-posted to tranny_rage and queer_rage.

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Watch Your Language You #%@&!

I wrote this back in Sap-timber, yet it is still just as relevant.
Calling us transgenders, disordered, retarded, morons, hysterical, freak shows, etc; calling trans*folk you disagree with trannies, men in dresses, pseudo-intellectuals, gay men (or women or lesbians if the trans*person is a guy), perpetuating stereotypes, "Tranny [Lastname]", hoping their transition goes horribly, speculating that their transition went horribly, etc.

Comparing the spending of time and money on bathrooms to supporting NAMBLA is so fucking wrong I have no words.
Telling us we aren't important and our struggles shouldn't make the news... yeah, getting murdered and arrested for using the bathroom totally isn't important. Fighting for our rights is always important and it should always be supported.
Not wanting to listen to bigoted speech is not silencing debate. When we tell off people for their obvious cissexism, like telling us to get to the back of the line or calling us freaks, it doesn't mean we can't take criticism or can't see other peoples' sides. It means that we won't take bigotry laying down and we won't accept hate.
By the way, I'm reposting this rant mostly because of the comments on several trans*-related articles on Queerty, a GLBT website. That's right, trans* people, queer people, and our allies were the ones saying this. Someone called Theresa Sparks "Tranny Sparks" because she returned her award to the HRC (btw Sparks, go girl!). A gay man called a trans*guy hysterical, the article about him struggling to use the men's room contrived, compared spending money on us to spending money on NAMBLA, as well as a host of other things. The actual article on the youtube video of a trans*woman getting trash thrown at her said, " A reader sent us this irksome, yet entertaining video of some British boys harassing an obviously delirious tranny, with this note attached..." Then some of the commenters went on to say she deserved to get attacked because of how she acted and how dare she go out in such a short skirt?! Several trans*women got into an argument on an article about Susan Stanton. A few Harry Benjamin Syndrome (HBS) women were calling my friend, because she doesn't want surgery and sometimes identifies as a shemale, a man and refusing to see her as a women; comparing her calling herself a woman to calling herself a turnip. My friend, retaliated by attacking one of the trans* woman's appearance.
Cissexism, transphobia, sexism, etc. are alive and well even among those who claim they are our allies; even among ourselves. This, I think, is what disheartens me the most. How divided we are. How quickly we judge. How ignorant of others' experiences and feelings. How hateful we can be.
I know I'm guilty too, we all are.

******
Can we stop using trans*, trans, transgender, gay, etc. as nouns?
You say blah blah blah a trans*person--not blah blah blah a trans*.
I am not a gay--I am a gay (or queer) person.
I am not a transgender--I am a transgender (or transgendered or trans*) person.

When talking about including or excluding trans*folk, can you, especially if you are yourself trans*(!!!), refer to cis* folk as just that--cissexed, cisgender, or cis*folk! If you don't like, don't know, or know that it would cause waaay more drama to do so, then at least call cis*folk "non-trans* folk".
When you talk about trans*women and women as two separate groups you reinforce the idea that trans*women aren't women (and you are a trans*woman!).

"Trans*folk/women are to cis*women as white folk are to black folk" fails as an analogy; find one that actually makes sense.

I have asked this before. What is the one experience or set of experiences that every cis*woman [everywhere of all backgrounds, races, class, nationalities, etc.] has had that no male-assigned person [anywhere of any class, race, nationality, etc.] has ever experienced?
What is this all-encompassing female experience?

PS: You automatically fail at life (-42 points) if you mention or talk about, in all seriousness, "Trans* Politics", "Trans* Agenda", "Trans* Lobby" or anything similar.

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Internalized

"…Susan has said all along that she’s not like other transgender people. She feels uncomfortable even looking at some, “like I’m seeing a bunch of men in dresses.”"

"Two years ago, when Steve first told me he was going to make this change, I was angry," Donna says. "But now I don't feel anger. I feel like being a transsexual is a disability. And it's hard to be angry with someone because they're disabled."-Donna Stanton

"I was a good city manager. I know I was. I had high expectations and held people responsible for achieving results," Susan says. "I could've made it work. I'm not some drag queen in a pink miniskirt with 6-inch heels. And I'm not Aunt Bee."

"I've never been a man. What man would want to cut off his balls?" Susan asks. "And I wasn't born a woman, so I can never be a real one."

You know Susan, you may feel that you'll never be a real woman because you weren't born one or whatever, but I know I'm a real man. Just because folks thought I was a girl doesn't mean I'm not a man. Fuck you; I'm not surprised trans*folks boo you when you speak. You've internalized so much cissexism I'm surprised it isn't steaming out your ears.

And there's nothing wrong with drag queens, 6-inch heels, or pink miniskirts.

Not only is there passing-privilege, cissexism, and ableism, there is also classism and sexism! After all, who is it that is often portrayed as being the `slutty, hyper-feminine tranny'?
Sex workers and other 'low class' trans*women.
She isn't like those people, she is rich and therefor isn't going to be all tacky and shit. /sarcasm

This whole article feels like it was written jokingly as a companion to Whipping Girl; since Ms. Serano describes articles like this and the views shown perfectly. I'm thinking that I'll write a review of WG with this article as proof... But maybe not, I don't know.

Here, in LJ transgender, is a discussion on the article.
And here is the article I'm quoting.

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Yay, more old posts few people ever read!

This is back when Rainsong/Renee was going as woman'sspace. Now I can recognize her style/arguments, but at the time I really didn't know much about her.

The blogs on blogspot give me so much awesome, and yet, so much bigotry
So, I've been reading a bunch of feminist blogs lately to procrastinate learn more about feminism, anti-racism theories, etc. I'm not reading the blogs of the bigots, but of course, I can't escape them. A new bigot appears on fetchmemyaxe.blogspot.com (who oddly enough, goes by womans'space. One of the other bigots blog is womensspace, who goes by Heart; though she says she isn't the same).

Ws'S: "I don't think that husbands and fathers who have said they are men, are women and I see them as annexing the lives of women. I feel this a grievous offense not unlike child molestation."
-Do I really need to say why this makes me upset? I mean, as a transguy I should be able to express outrage for this drivel.

Another blog, sexualambiguities.blogspot.com, the owner makes a post about the comments on FMMA. Womens'space shows up. (As does womensspace)

Ws'S: "I'm just not sympathetic to the trans movement or the trans identity. You all hurt and make invisible lot people that you aren't even aware of."
-O.O *goes back to throwing invisibility cloaks on people*

Heart: "I have said very explicitly that the trans movement is philosophically depraved. I acknowledge saying that. I have not stood in any kind of moral judgment of these people."
-We are at war with Eurasia. We have always been at war with Eurasia.

Ws'S: "As I said to an FTM on a feminist list once. 'You don’t care enough about women to be one, why are you here?'"
-WTF. Just because a guy doesn't identify as a woman, doesn't mean he doesn't care about "womens' issues" and/or equality.

Ws'S: "I said earlier masculinity is a disease and I assume that FTMs have want it and have caught [it]..."
-umm... Not all of [traditional, white, European] masculinity is bad. According to Wiki, masculinity can include practical, rational, trustworthy, leadership, objective, brave, etc.
Moreover, not all transguys follow societys' sex/gender roles. Most transpeople I've met make their own gender expression.
Being trans doesn't mean I want to be a guy, it means I am a guy.


To both Ws'S and Heart:
*A transwoman transitioning is nothing like blackface! STFUN00B!
*While some people may use 'passing' to mean "passing as a ____", I use it to mean "Passing as a cisguy."
*Not all transpeople follow gender/sex roles. Not all transpeople transition late in life. Not all transwomen were "husbands and fathers". Not all transpeople are white. not all transpeople were successful/rich before transitioning.

Please, ciswomen feminists. Stop speaking about things you know nothing about (trangenderism, transpeople, our definitions, etc.). Stop making judgments on these things you are ignorant about. Seriously, almost any page on transpeople says that gender identity != gender/sex roles.

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